Today I facilitated an amazing group of leaders who work at a skilled nursing facility. They are so clear on their purpose and have such principled leadership that they don’t have the maladies that plague some other groups I’ve worked with. Lack of clarity on vision and mission, self-absorption, poor reputation in the community, blaming one another for hard days, defensive or brittle relationships with one another. We talked today about how they survived Covid and the mix of post-traumatic stress AND post-traumatic growth they experienced as a result. I was inspired all day by their stories—the way they pay attention to their residents and how much pride they take in their work.
One leader who I’ll call Sam, the Environmental Services Director, told a story about going through inspection with the fire marshal. The fire marshal found 4 minor infractions and Sam was frustrated. He said, “Next year, you’re going to find zero.” The fire marshal said, “Sam, that’s just not possible!” And–you guessed it–that’s what Sam delivered on the following year. A perfect inspection.
Sam told this story not to toot his own horn, but as an example of how motivated he is to be of service. He sees his care of the building as directly tied to the health and well-being of staff and residents. He’s not wondering what his purpose is, or if his work is important or not. Every once in a while, I want to pack up my office and go work on one of my client teams! This was one of those days. What a gift.
Beyond having team envy (!), I’m moved by the ethic of excellence and caring in Sam’s story. I’m not advocating for perfectionism here (which is a denial of reality), but for doing the very best we can when it matters most. In much of our daily lives, it’s tempting to cut corners, accept mediocrity, or be fatalistic. What I’m noticing a lot lately is some version of, “Things are so messed up that I’m deciding not to care anymore. I’m just going to take care of me.” Yes, we need boundaries. We can’t give 100% on everything. Yes, there are moments in life when we need to center our own needs. But this “just take care of me” vibe I’m encountering makes me profoundly sad. At the very least, it will result in unhappiness and loneliness.
A big theme for me this year is discerning what to care about and what not to care about. Sam’s story reminds me how powerful it is to care about something that makes other people’s lives better. Maybe we can care less about optimizing our pantry organization, what other people want us to buy or do, or if we are driven enough. Maybe we can care less about trends and more about doing our jobs well, whatever they are. And sometimes, care less about our jobs and more about loving our lives.
As always, so grateful for this work I get to do and the amazing people like Sam that cross my path. Inspiration is all around.